Motherhood and Sleep Part 2

Since Lilly's trip to the ER, sleep has been different in our house. The week after I was so scared to have her sleep away from me, we had her sleep in our bed. Luckily she is not too much of a mover. After a week, we tried to transition her to her bed. However, it was unsuccessful. She screamed and hollered. It just wasn't worth it and I felt like maybe I underestimated how traumatic the experience was.

So bedtime has made quite an adjustment. And although it takes a lot longer for her to fall asleep, I find myself laughing and having happy tears while she falls asleep.

This is Lilly's method to falling asleep:

She rolls around on the bed.

Asks for a leg massage.

Cries

Asks for water

Sits on my head

Rolls around on my face

Chatters

Repeat the above

Rests her head on my shoulder and finds a comfortable position and falls asleep.

She is a serious massage addict, but I don't mind giving her chunky thighs a good rubbing. It's definitely not what I anticipated at 20 months, but mommyhood sure keeps me on my toes.

How and where does your little one sleep?

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If I could write a parenting book...

If I could write a book on parenting ,half of it would be dedicated to teaching your child how to sleep. 

Seriously!!

I've read so many books on the topic that even the librarian noticed. She asked me how lil was doing. ;)

It's been no mystery to those arounde how much I've been struggling with helping lil to get enough sleep. 

Since about December she was entering a weird state where she would only sleep for 20 minutes. I scolded myself at what a horrible parent I was. Despite everyone telling me "it will get easier," I just didn't believe them.

I learned during this time that babies don't enter a heavy sleep until after 20 minutes of falling asleep. 

t night we were still nursing Lil to sleep so I knew at least she was getting some rest. 

We tried everything; from getting her to soothe with a paci, car rides, ergo walks, and stroller rides. Although I got in great shape from exercising everyday, sometimes twice, a part of me knew that our lives could not always be doing this. 

5 months later nothing changed. We still nursed her to sleep or pushed her in a stroller for naptime. 

I decided to give cry it out a try. 

This method went against everything in my mamaness stood for. 

After about a month of trying it, it worked. Lil would cry/whine for about 10 minutes and be asleep. 

Scene: We change her diaper, give her Melvin, turn on Pandora to Rockabye Baby music, close the blinds, and put her in her crib.

Side note; I want to explain how we did this. I first had to notice when lil would get tired. She would rub her eyes and become fussy. If after 20 minutes she didn't settle down, we did without a nap, which was very difficult. On occasion when learning her sleep cycle I did let her cry for an hour. 

Okay so we got her to fall asleep, but no more than 1 hour would she sleep Nd I knew she needed at least 3 hours of naps during the day. That I was confident in. 

What was it?

I soon recognized that she was waking up sweating and put two and two together and began putting her to sleep in just a diaper. This helped quite a bit. It still got warm in her room occasionally due to the triple degree weather :(.

Then came night time in the crib.

We decided as a family that we would wait until after our vacation to do so. We stopped a few of her middle of the night feedings while in Tahoe. When she'd wake we'd bounce her back to sleep or sometimes just let her cry in our bed until she found a comfortable position. 

Then came the moment. We put her in without a night feeding. She woke up about an hour later and we brought her to our room. This happened twice. On the third night, SHE DID IT!!! SHE SLEPT 13 HOURS.

I still didn't get as much rest due to the fact that I was worried she wasn't breathing in there.

Happy to say that she is doing great and though its not perfect, this was the right time for us. She's growing up so much!!

How did sleep training go for you?

Baby Go To Sleep Sleep

To sleep train or not? I feel like this is a question plaguing me for the past month.

Why can't I just have confidence in my our parenting?!

I know at some point Little Miss needs to be in her crib, but there is that one thought that keeps creeping back into my mind...

She just wants to be held.

And I have no problem with that.

A lot of the sleep training that I agree with has you go into the child's room and soothe them back to sleep even if that means 100 times a night.

That scares me.

Cosleeping has been so nice as once Little miss goes to sleep. She pretty much stays asleep (minus a night feeding and a few nursing to pacify moments).


I do think I need to create a bedtime routine.


Here is the plan:

6:00: bath
6:15: story and/or song
6:30: nurse
6:45: lay to sleep


I'm gonna be working on this and know that I do need to be flexible with her schedule as things come up.

What does your child's bedtime routine look like?

Don't Wake A Sleeping Baby

WARNING!! 

The following post is written from a personal standpoint and is not meant to judge or criticize anyone.

I was so good about reading up on attachment parenting BEFORE Lilly was born, so I was so confident in my parenting style.

I guess I didn't read enough because now that in the thick of it.

I feel lost.

I feel subject to people's criticism.

I feel sensitive

I feel unsuccessful.

I know that "all babies are different" but I can't seem to shake my need for striving toward perfection when I feel helpless.

I break down. I stress out. And I have a mopey session.

But rest assured. I have felt a weight lifted off my shoulders.

My confidence as a parent will never be found in perfection and I have to let it go.

I read an article on sleeping and realized its NOT my fault.

There is so much pressure to have a baby be independent so young and I have rooted my beliefs in attachment parenting because that works for us.

In this article by Dr. Sears, it states
"An important fact for you to remember is that your baby's sleep habits are more a reflection of your baby's temperament rather than your style of nighttime parenting. And keep in mind that other parents usually exaggerate how long their baby sleeps, as if this were a badge of good parenting, which it isn't. It's not your fault baby wakes up."

That is seriously all I needed to hear.
It's not my fault.

I'm not ruining my baby.

I also learned that the reason Lilly was waking up after 20 minutes was due to her sleep cycle. Babies don't fall into deep sleep right away. They have a period of light sleep beforehand.

I should have read this a while ago, but I glad I have now!!

I really want to stress that this isn't for everyone. Keep in mind, I'm that crunchy mom who had her baby at home in a tub ;)

How did you make it through sleepless nights with your little one?

Nap time?!

I was chatting with a friend yesterday and we got on the topic of how do I put Lilly to sleep.

Lilly definitely goes through phases! She's not the perfect baby in the regards of books and standards (but I think she is ;).

Everyone always asks 'Oh is she sleeping through the night," Most people are kind when I reply 'no.' But everyone and then, I can see the judgement behinds their eyes.

Well Lilly has 8 teeth and has been teething since 3 1/2 months. That might be why she isn't sleeping through the night.

Or that I'm spoiling her by not 'waiting' or letting her cry it out.

I digress.

Here are the 5 ways I put Lilly to sleep.
1. Nurse
2. Go for a walk/run
3. Go for a drive
4. Rock her in her Rockid
5. Hold her in my arms and jog in place.

Occasionally she has fallen asleep while I have massaged her or while on the sling.

Thoughts on sleeping? Did you have a silly way of putting your little one to sleep!

Friday Video

So this is what happens when I want our little miss to go to sleep. seriously...she is too precious for words!!

Have a great weekend!! We are going to San Francisco for a wedding shower. I'll be taking plenty of pics!!